An Open Letter to our Elected Officialls

First, an apology.  I'm sure everyone is a sick of politics as I am at this point. So I'm rather sorry to bring it up.

 
But writing brings my thoughts into focus, and brings me sanity.. And today, I really need to get some more non-partisan (perhaps even anti-partisan?) frustrations off my chest.  
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Dear US and State Government Elected Politicians and Candidates, of All Parties:

We, The People of the United States of America, your constituents, are putting you on notice.  Consider this a written warning, which could lead to termination, if you don't improve.  We, The People, are tired of your bickering, of your muck-throwing, of your party-line stances, of your intolerance for opposing viewpoints, of your assumptions that you are smarter and "know better" than your constituents.

We, The People are disgusted  with your unwillingness to remember that you are obligated to represent the views, needs, and rights of *all* of the constituents living within your district, whether they voted for you or not.

Start with some simple logic to determine where the balance of your constituents' desires truly lies. Hint: the narrower your margin of victory,  the farther away from your platform the balance point of their views is likely to lie.   Since we effectively have only 2 candidates to choose from in a final election,  Our views are almost certainly not balanced on you.    Most of you were voted in by a by a fairly slim majority. and of those, it would be reasonable to guess that about half were more liberal than your positions, and about half are more conservative.   the scale is balanced on you.  But... then , on the side of the scale closer to your major opponent, add the constituents who voted for him.  Those all fit on the same side of  the scale, and the balance is suddenly massive tipped -- find the balance of your constituency's  actual views, and *that* is the position you should actually be representing.   As you can see, this is probably far more to the center than your personal platform, or certainly your party's platform.   We, The People, your bosses, expect you to represent the balance of *our* views.  And as such, we expect you to work with your fellow elected officials; regardless of part affiliation;  in order to achieve that balance needed to implement repairs, changes, and progress;  and to truly represents Us, the American People.

Please stop a moment, and listen - truly LISTEN - to what "We, The People," your bosses, believe in for the future of this country. Listen to what we actually want and need.  The party is not your boss - The People are. And there are two major areas you will need to work on, if you wish to continue in our employ:

First, we need to address your inappropriate campaign tactics. This campaign season, you have all focused on  painting the other guy as The Worst Thing That Could Happen or The Embodiment Of Evil. That tactic must be stopped, it is divisive, unproductive, terrible for the morale of our country in these fragile times, terrible for the image we try to present to the rest of the world, and, above all, not nearly as true as you'd like us to think.  These tactics must be stopped.
We, The People are tired of voting for the lesser of two evils. Instead of telling us why we need to vote against the other guy, tell us why would should vote *for* you.  Instead of telling me how you are going to mitigate the damage you are blaming on the other guy (which, in reality, was created over time by a combination of the works of both parties), please campaign on how you are actually going to make our country better, how you are going to take us forward, and fix our problems for the long term.  Stop talking about repealing what the other side passed, and start talking about passing new and better solutions.

Second, let's think back to Kindergarten, where you actually got a grade on "Plays Well With Others".If you continue to use the tactics of the last few years, with its keynotes of division, derision, subversion, half-truths, lies of omission, lack of respect for your fellow leaders and constituents, misleading propaganda, other con-man and warlike tactics, and, most importantly, your refusal to cooperate across party lines.  If you continue to put your party line ahead of your constituency's needs and desires, then we will have no choice but to fire you. And by "you" I mean you the politician, you the party member, and you the party.  Our government cannot be productive in putting this country to rights until its politicians and leaders stop acting like 5-year-olds, stop trying to play your constituents against each other for position, and start working together to come up with practical solutions to this great nation's problems:  solutions that can actually be implemented, instead of languishing forever in procedural limbo.

I still have not decided who I will vote for this election, but the one thing I am certain of is that, in order to get our economy moving, to get our debt out of control, and to maintain our position as citizens of the greatest country in the world,  we need to elect cream-of-the-crop representatives of "We, The People."

Fat-cat party-politicians who are interested only in the next election, and only in pushing the agenda of "They,The Party" are no longer welcome here.

Sincerely,
Tishabug H.
Your Boss, Constituent, Citizen, Voter

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Feel free to comment, but as a favor to my sanity, I would ask that you keep any comments polite, constructive, considerate, and fact-checked.

Of Elephants and Donkeys

I wish I could just go hide my head under a pillow until American government is fixed. But without participation, things will never improve... So it's back to figuring out my vote; to writing to my congressmen about the disservice their partisan trenches are doing to us, their constituents; to researching the reality behind all the crazy scary polarizing rhetoric... And I encourage each and every one of you, no matter your political opinions, to do the same.

No progress can be made in fixing our nation's problems until our government can look at the whole picture of practical solutions, instead of sticking to high-minded ideals, and can work together to find a middle ground we can all believe in. If it turns out to be a solution we all grumble about, because it's too liberal for the conservatives among us, and too conservative for the liberals, then maybe they've finally found the perfect balance...

Just a thought.

Of Mice and Men and Cashmere

Our marriage started with bagpipes, a dancing Cinderella, a drunk mice conga line, and the blessings of a hotel full of conventioning Shriners.  That should have been my first clue that we were in for quite an adventure.

Backpedalling a little:   I was just past my 25th birthday, sometime in October, when I began to become infatuated with a really hot 6'1 redhead in the next department over.  I didn't need him: by then I was making my own way in the world with a reasonable amount of success, an ok salary, and a halfway decent single-girl social life. But when he noticed me, my smiles lasted an extra second; every step had a little more bounce; and every morning I had one small extra reason to bounce out of bed.

When he asked me to marry him several months later,  we were still in the throes of blind adoration. It was an easy enough question to answer.  The remaining early passion carried us unblinkingly through our September wedding day, our first apartment, and buying our first house.

But things change.  The hot skinny redhead  was apparently a brunette all along. His waistline  expanded as his hairline receded. 
To be fair, I hardly remained the size 8 perky, made-up, hair-curled fair-skinned bride of our wedding photos, either. 

We began to learn that the very qualities that attracted us to each other have frustrating flip-sides. We learned that bodily functions happen, that we are both reasonably hopeless in any forms of physical labor or craftsmanship, that neither of us much like to mow the lawn, and that we have differing concepts of "clean".

 Our first full-on fight, about 6 months post-wedding, involved doing the laundry:   He brought up a load of clean clothes he'd washed while I was at work on yet another weekend, and set it on the bed. I found it there a few hours later, all mounded and piled in the basket, getting wrinklier by the minute.   And right on top were two of my favorite sweaters… or what was left of them after a run through the dryer on "hot". With unzipped blue jeans.   

   It started with our then-normal  overly polite dance of words, until the stony silence he tended to adopt when upset finally pushed me over the edge. The anger I'd been building up over a million little things finally burst out… the flames building higher as his continued silence only fueled them.  It took a lot of screaming, but his bubble of silence finally burst too. And only then did we both finally  open up about what was really upsetting us, calm down enough to see things truly from the other's point of view, begin to repair to disconnects, and go to bed forgiving, and forgiven.

That was the day our relationship changed. That was the day the oath we'd sworn in front of our minister, friends, family, and a hotel full of Shriners finally turned into a partnership of equals, committed to facing life together, and creating a whole that was greater than the sum of its parts. That was the day our mutual infatuation turned into a marriage.  All because of a blue cashmere sweater. (in fact, the very same one I'd worn the evening he proposed)

Tomorrow, we celebrate 12 years to the day since we traded rings in the Marriott's Grand Ballroom. 12 years of arguments, vacations, illnesses, dental problems, parties,  holidays, family functions. 12 years of moves across town, across state lines, of job changes, dog-walkings, dishwashing, shopping. 

12 years of the ups and downs, the beautiful sights and knockdown fights, the joys and pain of everyday life with a guy who has far more faith in me than I do, who never sweats the little things, who find laughter and joy and adventure in the most random places, who has no sense of ownership or privacy or shame… who knows exactly when to stop asking me questions and start hugging or taking over decisions… and who puts up with all of my million and one faults?  That is certainly beyond price. 

And, yes, 12 years of ruined sweaters and blouses and swimsuits…  Because "someone" still occasionally forgets to read labels. (And forgets that he's supposed to be banned from the laundry room for life.)

But that's ok. 

I can get a new cashmere sweater down the street at Kohl's. 

Starting a new marriage would be trickier -- Where I would ever find another conga-line of drunk bagpiping shriner-mice on motor-trikes?

~ The Sappy Part:  Clayton, you've been the central character in my life's story for fully one-third of it's lived-but-not-yet-written pages. I still have no idea why you put up with me, but am eternally grateful and delighted that you have. Perhaps you really are not the "Best. Husband. Ever..." but you are certainly the best husband for me.  A ma vie de coer entier.   I love you. ~